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ME

NatKimMan

Hi I'm Nat :D I'm currently inlove so my posts are mostly jiwang, haha :D
♥♥♥

hey, lets talk
Monday, August 17, 2009
9:43 AM
So I had a talk with my friend today. Coz she was having some problems with her boyfie. So yeahhh . And she told me apa jadi suma when her boyfie called. And I realised that the convo that she had with him, is the exact convo fidot and I would have when we fight. I would be so keras kepala, and wouldnt stop assuming and he would say things like "kalau I nak bla, I dah bla lama dah" or things like that. And I think, any guy yang ckp cmtu to a girl, that means he loves her like gddamn much. It dsnt really matter how he says it, coz if he dsnt mean it, he wont even bother to say it. Ya dig ? okay, im merepeking alot these days.

And that made me realise how much Fidot loves me doh. I mean, its not like I hvnt, but now I knw for sure dohh. And I love him with all my heart, and I know I'll love him forever. I just know it. Im missing him so much right now, coz I havnt seen him since Saturday. :( But he's having exam, and I want him to focus.

*if you're reading this sayang. I just want to let youu know that I love you so much okay. And I know I've been treating you like shit, but sumpah, I didnt mean to.

Sorry,
Sunday, August 16, 2009
9:47 AM
I don't know if I can yell any louder
How many time I've kicked you outta here?
Or said something insulting?

I can be so mean when I wanna be
I am capable of really anything
I can cut you into pieces
But my heart is broken

How did I become so obnoxious?
What is it with you that makes me act like this?
I've never been this nasty
Da da da, da da

Can't you tell that this is all just a contest?
The one that wins will be the one that hits the hardest
But baby I don't mean it
I mean it, I promise
Da da da, da da

I forgot to say out loud how beautiful you really are to me
I cannot be without, you're my perfect little punching bag
And I need you, I'm sorry

Please don't leave me
Please don't leave me
I always say how I don't need you
But it's always gonna come right back to this
Please, don't leave me


I've been a really bad girlfriend, always taking it out on him, getting mad over stupid things, Im sorry. I dont tell you that I need you enough. But I do. And yre my everything, and I love you so much.


gliterzzzz
Friday, August 14, 2009
6:18 AM
OMG, today hyper gilaaa. hahah. Aliah terpaling hyper kot O: And layan gila buat add maths today, although banyak salah. hahaha. :D And we went to rehat early coz i wanted to see fidot, hehe :D His SPM trials just started so yeah. And dia punya rehat awal today. so yeah. And then we had English. I thought she was gnna be in a really bad mood today. But she wasnt. We talked about lovers sumaa. And I confessed that I'm inlove. hahahah. And she was like, "from which school ? what happened? ". AHAHAH.

And then we had chem. BOSAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN. And I had glitter in my pencil box. Dah la banyak gila. And I started throwing some glitter onto Aliah. Sumpah banyak gilaa Aliah kena. haha. And it became a glitter fight between Amer, Aliah and I. But Aliah kena paling banyak. ahhha.

Then hyper gilaa ah. Cam biasaaaaa :D :D and blk. Im bored now, and I cant kacau my hubby coz he's studying. He has add maths tomorrow. :( GOODLUCK HUBBY ! :D


One in a million
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
8:32 PM
Here's the thing about Fidot,

He's funny, and he is manja, and no way he is stronger than me. Haha. He's half of my size -.- And I dont think he can ever carry me. HAHAHA. But thats not important, coz he's caring and loving and I never want to lose him.

He's so adorable when he is shy, you can see it in his smile. Hehe. When he's emo, his smile is hardly even a smile, its like a really big frown, and its ugly. And I would tell him "I know there's smtg wrong, I can see it in your smile" and he would just smile harder. And it'll just look uglier. Haha. And when he lies, his smile is a bit like when he's shy, but its like cheekier. Haha. Sumpah. Comel gila.

He talks a lot. And he likes to cut people off while they're talking and its so annoying. But he doesnt realise it and some how, I find that cute too. Hahha.

His jokes are not sensitive at all, but Azam's jokes are worse. HAHAHA. But its damn funny, and stupid. Everytime we fight, he would make stupid jokes, and I'll try so hard to not laugh at it. Haha.

He's amazing in many ways. He makes me laugh, he makes me cry, he makes me feel happy and loved. Lets just say, he's perfect for me.


Rapping Competition
Friday, August 7, 2009
4:23 AM
Anyway, last night was F-U-N. HAHAHAH. How lame was that ? -.- Amelia and I wanted to have a picnic yesterday, but tak jadi. -.- So we ate at her house :D She cooked lasagna (I SUCK AT SPELLING) and I brought MANGO JUICE xD Hahahah. Then we talked and talked, then dah maghrib. And she ajak tido rumah, so I did :D :D My dad hmpr tak bagi -.-' We went to her uncle's house, kat Ara Damansara, i think. Coz ada this thingie but tak jadi so we just ate. And then we went to mcd with anuar and 2 of her cousins jugak. Okay laa :D Then we got home and started rapping to
Eminem's song. HAHAHA. sumpah takde kerja. And we recorded us rapping and singing some other shit. Haha. Lawak ahh. (: And then Amy slept at 3++ and I think I slept at 4++ I couldnt sleep coz I drank coffee at Amy's uncle's house -.- haha. So yeah.

And tadi bgn awal gila, like 9. HAHA. And mandi sumaa. And then her mom cooked lamb and fish and chips :D I ate the lamb, nyummyy. I love lamb. hahah. Then tgk tv, and I went back. Coz my dad tak bagi blk lmbt :(

Now Im fucking bored and fucking emo. -.- I dont know why. Sigh. Horrible images are running trhough my mind. And I cant get it out.

Wrong
Thursday, August 6, 2009
9:06 AM
Tomorrow is Friday. And I havent gone to school since yesterday and Im not going tomorrow too. My leg fucking hurts a lot doh. Sometimes I think its never gonna get better. Anyway, I dont have anything new to blog about. Only I've started going to tuition again, coz I feel like Im falling back really far. And Im fucking worried about my studies. Sigh. Anyway, staying home is a really boring thing to do unless if your home is fucking fun. I miss everybdy, sumpah doh. I feel so distant from everyone. Even from my own boyfriend. Sigh. He didnt go to school on tuesday, and when he did on wednesday, I didnt pulak coz of my damn leg. Today pon sama. And I guess I wont be seeing him or anyone tomorrow jugak. Until Monday, but I guess Im not going to school on Monday jugak coz ada perhimpunan and sumpah menyusahkan. Sigh. I never thought that losing the ability of walking, well I didnt really lost the ability of walking la, could put you down doh. I guess what Im trying to say is that I feel kinda lonely right now. Sigh. Thinking of happy things just makes me feel more lonely. And no one can understand this feeling. Its bad enough that I couldnt walk properly, but I have to menyusahkan orang lain to angkat my things. Sigh. I guess it is better for me to stay home, tak menyusahkan others.

And now Fidot pulak dah nak sakit. And dia ckp pasal H1N1, and ramai orang dah mati suma. Wtf man. Sigh.

Sumpah takde mood doh. Everything is just not right. And I hate the fact that my leg is taking a very long time to get better.

Amer's birthday (:
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
8:25 AM
So today is Amer's birthday :D Yesterday I planned with a few of my classmates and Aliah jugak tp beli cake :D And ramai jugak laa join in tong tong beli cake :D I asked Aliah to buy the cake, coz I didnt have transport. Nasib Aliah dpt beli. Thanks babe ! :D So she brought it pagi tadi. :D It was suppose to be a surprise tapi kantoi coz masa tu Aliah and Muqri was holding the cake kat canteen and then Amer lalu nak gi agama -.-' Thanks for ruining the surprise Amer. Haha. And then school cm biasa sumaaa. Masa rehat, Amer sat beside me. And then dia ckp "tak makan cake ke" and terus bla coz I was talking to Ilisa. -.- Dia cam emo sket. Haha. Then kitorang masuk class and tukar physics teacher pulak ! Its the new teacher, I forgot her name. -.- We actually wanted to bring in the cake masa tu but the teacher tak bagi. Bangang betul. And then we had addmaths. And I had to distract Amer coz masa tu Aliah and Muqri pergi amik cake. And then masa they dah nak smpai ,semua orang tutup tingkat and kipas. Then someone jerit "sape tutup tingkap ? and kipas? " -.-' what a way to cover kan. Haha. The cake agak sedap ahh. Haha. We bought chocolate cake, nyumm. Haha. And then he brought back some. Then ada sivik and sejarah. Bosan gila -.-' Oh oh, masa tengah 'distract' Amer I took some ugly pictures of him and myself and other people. Hhahaha. And I was kinda good at distracting him. Haha. And Amer thought dia tkkan kena pukul, but hell he was wrong. Hahah. Kesian gila. Anyway, best gak ah. :D :D And I hope you like the cake Amer !

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMER ! YOU'RE FUCKING 16 ! haha

oh and my hubby didnt come to school today. -.- Coz he studied at home. I miss him, but takpe lah. He needs to study for our future. (:

6 Fucking Months (:
Monday, August 3, 2009
6:43 AM
HAPPY SIX MONTHS SAYANG ! :D

Omg, i had the best anni ever ! Haha. He called me last night at 12 am and talked, lama jugak la. Hehe (: And then I went to school like normal. And ada perhimpunan. I knew Fidot was going to give smtg, but I have no idea what it is. It was suppose to be a surprise but then tak jadi, coz when he went out to buy and make the card, someone told me that he saw him. And he terpaksa bgi tau that he was out because he was doing smtg for me. So yeah, but I was still surprised. Sumpah tak expect langsong. Dah la its his first time giving me smtg. And dia nmpk cam nervous. Anyway, masa tu kat dewan. I was sitting on a chair far away from everyone coz of my leg -.- Masa hbs perhimpunan, I was holding the drawing that I gave him, and he came to me. I asked him to pegang. But he taknak, he said "bagi nanti la, macam trade" hehe (:

And then lepas tu he went up to his class to take it, and I went back to my class. I waited lama la, but I guess he was nervous ? Haha. Then finally I saw him coming, but he sat outside dekat pondok. Dia tunjuk Ayesha the thing. ( yes I saw sayang) Haha. But masa tu I didnt see what it was. Then I pulak started to get nervous. I was afraid he wouldnt like the drawing :(

Then he called me out, and dia nampak cam malu gila. He was hiding it behind his back. Then dia bagi kan, and to my surprise, ITS A CARD! Sumpah tak expect gila ! Dah la buat sendiri. And btw, Fidot is not good in arts . Haha. But the card is beautiful, (: Sumpah happy gila masa tu. Cam , WOWWW ! Haha. Then dia wish semua, hehe (: And he said jmpa masa rehat, but tak dpt hug masa tu coz ada cikgu lalu suma :(

Then I went back into my class, and cepat cepat bukak the card. Sumpah comel gilaaa kat dalam. He printed our picture and pasted it in the card, and buat hole, so that you can still see the picture when you close the card. On the cover tulis F and then arrow, loves N. Sumpah sweeeet gila ! And inside, ada this small pouch, and inside the pouch ada letter from him, and panjang jugak ah. Haha.

I started reading the letter, sumpah khusyuk gila baca. And I cried. I couldnt stop the tears from pouring doh. I was just so darn happy. Ada poem gak, so I read the poem first. Sumpah nangis sial. Hehe. I was so touched. Dah la his effort to make this card, cam gila babi sial. I love the card so so so so so so much. Dah la the card is shaped like the number 6. And bila bukak nmpk cam butterfly. Haha.

I couldnt stop hugging the card and reading the letter over and over again doh. It was just too beautiful (:

Ohyeah, and today is ayesha's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY AYESHA ! We celebrated today and smlm. I went to her house yesterday because her sister plan nak buat surprise party. Tapi tak brape nak surprise ah. Tapi best ah. Haha. Fidot came and picked me up naik cab, and then terus gi rumah ayesha naik the same cab. That was so sweet. Ada pizza, cupcakes. Kitorang tgk cerita coming soon. That movie is kinda scary tapi subtitle dia sumpah takleh bla. English dia broken gila babi and takde pape make sense ! We were laughing like shit reading the subtitle. hhaha.

Then after that borak borak, and balik after maghrib. Ayesha's mom sent umar, luqman, fidot and I back. Tapi fidot gi rumah luqman la. Ayesha's mom is so sweet (:

And then tadi petang we all, (Fidot, Umar, Aliah, Ayesha and I) lepak rumah Luqman. Best gak ah. Banyak benda lawak. Umar bought a slice of cake for ayesha. Dia tak expect langsong. Haha. But masa tu Fidot belum smpai lagi. Kesian dia. Haha. And then we played truth or dare. Dare takde sape nak coz semua orang tau mesti kena cm sial. Haha. So yeah. And then bnyk ckp ckp. Oh oh, Fidot and Umar main dam. Sumpah lawak gila doh. Coz fidot everytime nak kena makan nak start over. Haha. Comel gila kan ? We all went back after maghrib. Best ah actly, coz ckp ckp suma. And dpt spend time with my hubby. (:

Sumpah he is stuck in my mind doh skrg. I cant stop thinking abt him. Its not that I have before, but today cam more la. Sumpah (: The other day, we had a conversation pasal kerja. Before this, he didnt knw what he wants to be. And the hari tu, dia tetiba ckp pasal study semua. And how he tiba tiba minat in dr punya stuff. But he wants to be a dr mata coz he said sikit darah suma. Haha. (Dia tak tahan tgk darah) And he said he wants to work hard so that we could have a great future. And he said he'll make sure that my future would be great semua. Sumpah touching gila (': That gave me semangat to work hard in the future. Coz I want to make sure we have a great future too. And before this kan, sumpah malas gila nak stdy. But now, dia cm bgi semangat doh. Coz now, cam dah ada purpose in my life. I've found the reason why I should study, why I should work hard to achieve my dreams suma and all that. And it feels great doh. Sumpah (: And I knw its not easy, and it wont be easy for us too. But I know we will make it. I just knw it. I've never been more confident in my life doh. (:

If y're reading this sayang, I love you so much okay. And you give me semangat to live doh, you give me semangat to make an effort for a better future. Takde orang pernah buat I rasa cmni. And I dont knw what I'll do without you. You are my everything doh (: And I love you so much,

Ohyeah, here's the poem that he gave me ;

6 months has gone by,
and my love just keeps getting stronger,
I'll love you till the day I die,
I'll love you forever and ever,
when times get hard,
you know that I'm here,
I'll hold you in my arms,
and make all the darkness disappear,
I never want to lose you,
and thats a fact,
but I know you're not going anywhere,
Cause you've already signed the contract.

Last line lawak gila. Haha. This poem made me cry, hehe. (:

Happy 6 months sayang, and Happy bithrday Ayesha ! :D

Perogol Bersiri.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
10:35 PM



OMG, now dah Sunday, lama gila tak blog, sorry. I've been really really sick. :/ i didnt go to school on tuesday, thursday and friday. But i did on wednesday, but my kaki sakit gila babi. Then demam teruk gila on thursday and now baru baik. Sigh :/ Demam masa tu memang seksa doh. Dengan pening, selsema, and pening lagi, and batuk, suma. Haih. And masa tu all i wanted to do other than sleeping is seeing my hubby, :/ sumpah I felt like hugging him so tightly.

Anyway, by friday masa masih demam sikit. I told my self that I need to recover by tomorrow coz ada Y.E sales at Pyramid. I was feeling better by petang but my kaki sakit gila sial masa tu. Tak larat gila nak jalan. I have no idea asal sakit sgt, dah la tak jalan bnyk. Sigh. Demam dah nak baik la, tapi pening masih ada. Malam tu, Fidot called, and we talked and talked. (: Dah la the whole day tak dengar his voice. :( Pastu tgh ckp ckp, tetiba dia tanya if i can keluar. Agak terkejut laa O: It was 10 00pm cmtu masa tu. I thought i could go out, coz my dad masa tu takde kat rumah. So cpt cpt siap sumaa, tetiba my dad balik. -.-' But I still went out. Haha. Best la malam tu. We were hugging, talking, laughing. But pening tu masih ada, and I hope I didnt jangkit him with my flu. O: But it made me feel a lil better coz I get to see him and lepas rindu semua. ngeee (: Oh Oh, dah 3 fridays in a row kitorang jumpa masa malam (: hehe. Then I went back at 1 30am cmtu laaa. Coz I need to wake up around 6am++ the next day for Y.E. sales. -.- And he needed to go back too.

Then Saturday came and I woke up at 6 15am cmtu la. When I woke up, the first thing I did was check my phone and I didnt get any text from hbby telling me that he's home safe. Sumpah worried gila. I starting thinking of horrible things that could happen to him on his way home the night before. Risau gila babi, but I tried not to think about those negative things. So okay, eventually I got up and showered, yada yada yada. Siap suma. And Aliah picked me up at around 7 40am. Awal gila kan nak gi Pyramid ? haha. And we got there cam 7 55am cmtu. First time masuk pyramid pagi pagi. Haha. Agak excited la. hahahaha. Dah la gelap O: The Y.E. sales was held kat depan Giant lama tu. There were 16 booths, so that means 16 schools participated. And best gak ah. It was interesting (: My shift was at 9 30am till 11 30am and dengan Aliah. Oh Oh, and before my shift started cam arnd 9 cmtu, I accidentally bersin kuat gila babi nak mampos, and everybdy pandang and gelak -.- Sumpah malu gila. hahahaha. And right after that huge bersin, hbby called, hehe (: And sumpah lega gila to hear his voice, and to knw that he's okay. (: Anyway, tak ramai orang ada masa tu, coz duh, awal gila kan. -.- We didnt sell anything mula mula. Haha, sedih gila. But then, masa the last 10 mins jual a few la. Haha. :D :D

Then finally our shift habis. Sumpah masa tu happy gila coz tengah lapar siot. Hahaha. So we went to eat at Pancake House. Sumpah sedap gila babi nak mati tapi kenyang gila so tak hbs, sumpah rugi gila coz i ordered 3 pieces of pancakes and I only ate like satu setengah je. -.- Oh Zafira pon ada. :D haha, but she didnt eat, coz she ate with Mun earlier. I went back after eating coz my leg was just killing me. Sumpah tak tahan gila.


I went back, and talked to my mom. Hehe. I talked to her for like 2 hrs or smtg like that. Then I got so tired, and tengah pening gila babi, so i decided to sleep and get some rest before setia installation. Its was about 3 30 masa tu, and Fidot called again. And he thought I was mad abt smtg, coz actly smtg happened and pancake hse, but I dnt wanna write it here. But I wasnt so yeah. And we planned to meet at parade before setia installation so yeah, we did. At 5 40 +++ ? Dah la setia installation was at 8. Haha. Awal gila dtg kan. And lepak la. Ckp ckp. And went karaoke-ing. Well, I didn't sing coz my tekak sakit gila. Haha. So dia la nyanyi sorang sorang. But sumpah lawak gila. Haha. :D And then we ate and Uncle Lim's. Sedap gilaa makan nasi lemak ayam rendang, haha. Dah la lepas tu nak makan lagi masa setia installation. Haha.

And then lepas makan, I went to pizza hut for the installation thingie. (: Fidot didnt go, but I wish he was there, coz sumpah lagi lawak if dia ada. :( But I had a great time masa the installation. Best gila. Camwhore gila babi. Haha. But my pictures were all ugly, I think there's only one picture of me smiling. Haha. Yang lain semua macam cibai. buruk gila babi. Haha.




I was standing on the seat. -.-
Bermasalah, haha
Bermasalah 2
Muka cam perogol bersiri
Tergelak, haha

Perogol bersiri 2, Einul cam polis. haha



HAHA. last one (:


actually ada bnyk lagi gmbr, tapi malas gila nak upload kat blog. haha. :D And then after all that camwhoring, kena balik. Coz parade was closing. Haha. I went back with Umar, Ismail hantar. He also sent Luqman home. And I met up with Fidot again outside my apartment. And lepak again (: Hehe. He is so sweet, datang all the way from PJ to see me. (: He makes me so so special doh, but smtimes I feel like Im making him feel like I dont appreciate him. *sayang, if you're reading this, I do okay. I just dnt know how to show it. :( Im the kind of girl who sucks in relationships doh. But being with him feels soooooooooo sooooooo right. Susah la nak explain (: And tmrw is a very very special day for us. Its our 6 mnths anni, (: I love you sayang. Its 3 41pm, and Im missing youuu and I cant wait to hug you tomorrow (: